For every family there comes a final holiday together. Where should you go? Sarah Tucker has some tips
Tlempus fugit. Not so long ago I was writing about my first ever holiday with my son, Tom – then only a few weeks old – and encouraging other mothers to travel abroad with their babies too. Other countries, I suggested, were friendlier and more relaxed in their attitude towards children. Seventeen years later the UK has moved on, but the improvement has a mechanical feel, as if the lessons have been learned by rote. The innate affection for children that characterises so many cultures has somehow still failed to take root.
And now, here I am, blinking in the realisation that Tom’s childhood rainbow is at an end. Time to think about, not our first holiday together, but what might well be our last.
To parents in a similar position, a word of warning: it is your child, not you, who will decide whether this last great adventure takes place. The brutal relevant criteria are as follows: 1) Does your child actually still want to drag along with you? 2) If not, is he or she stumped for a more appealing alternative? Only with a brace of affirmatives to these questions can you proceed to the planning stage.
And this is where you get to reap what you have sown during the previous two decades. Do you really know what enthuses your child (apart from anything screen-led)? Have you instilled a secure grasp of budgetary realities? If so, will it actually make a blind bit of difference?
Bear in mind too that, with A levels safely behind them, the little geniuses are bound to be exhausted. More than likely they will want to go on holiday for a week with their friends, probably to Spain, Cyprus, Malta, Italy – anywhere, indeed, unclouded by the threat of ISIS, insurrection or any other form of unrest. A steadily narrowing field.
This will be their beach holiday; a time for parents to absent themselves, ensuring merely that: a) the kids are safe; b) they have enough money to have fun, but not enough for too much fun; c) they come back with an enriched appreciation of mum and dad. Yeah, right.
If you want to go big, try Antarctica, the Galapagos, tiger trekking in India, dune surfing in Australia, ranching in Canada or a luxury safari in Africa. They are all good, but ask first: don’t assume that your child will appreciate it just because it’s expensive. If they want to learn something such as scuba diving, make it somewhere special, like Maldives, as the cheaper and closer option of Egypt is no longer safe. And do it with them. If you don’t, it will be like putting them in a kids club, as you may have done when they were toddlers. More final insult than final fling.
Another option is the single parent holiday, even if you aren’t a single parent. Dad takes the daughter, mum the son and off you go. Then swap. The dynamics are great and the teenagers appreciate the attention – even if they don’t always show it.
With all that in mind, I asked Tom where he wanted to go. “Anywhere safe and hot,” was his uninspired response, placing Southern Italy firmly in the frame. “But if you’re going somewhere really good,” he added quickly, “I’ll come too.”
Costa Rica. It’s good for wildlife, not too pricey and several tour operators offer great specialised trips for families. As for safety, Central America might not be famed as a model of law and order, but with the currents of terror encircling the earth, few places beyond Tunbridge Wells are entirely devoid of risk.
So that’s settled. Of course, it may not turn out to be the last holiday at all. But that’s no reason not to treat it as such. It will be all the more precious if you do.
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